I had a conversation with my cousin about relationships. Men specifically. How we as women sometimes react poorly when we’re upset. Seeing only red and spitting as much fire as we can in order to show him we “don’t need [you]”… We always know how to cut the deepest. But this is counterproductive. It only fuels the initial argument.
I advised that instead of giving ultimatums, giving the silent treatment (even if he doesn’t want to talk about it), or raising your voice, try to stop and think. Identify in your head what it is that you want to accomplish, what’s your desired outcome and progress forward with those ideas in mind. Now let’s be real for a quick second, I am all too familiar with being Princess Petty and I can be the first one to spew hate. My argument is that when it comes to someone that you care about, be it romantic or platonic, words are going to hurt more than you think. After the dust settles and everything is fine again, those words can never disappear.
One thing that I have realized in my almost 5 year relationship (almost 2 years of marriage) with my husband is that he shares similar flaws with the husbands/spouses/significant others (SOs) of my closest friends. Interesting. It’s pretty funny actually, when we share experiences.
This realization has lead me to the idea of a new blog series: Confessions of a Wife. In my own efforts to keep calm and think and respond rationally during arguments, I still have my private thoughts… and I want to share them with you!
This series is for my friends that I’ve swapped stories with over wine nights, wives, husbands, boyfriends, girlfriends and anyone else who can relate to the roller coaster of relationships: Cheers to the SO’s!!