Moving On (STILL counting my blessings)!

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Hi guys,

Happy Spring! Minnesota has been having great weather today. I can’t wait until it’s warm enough to get out on the water. Let’s be honest, that’s the main reason I agreed to move here anyways! 😉

I shared in my last post some health/family concerns that I’ve been dealing with for the last month. My faith and strength has definitely been tested in the month of March. As March comes to a close and Spring is starting to show its face, I want to bring everything full circle and move on.

I lost my Aunt on Wednesday, March 15 to cancer. She was such a beautiful soul. My cousin (her daughter) is not taking it so well. She’s trying with everything she has to be strong. I pray for her strength.  It gives me some peace of mind to think that my Aunt is resting now with no pain.

As for myself, I have some scaring from the rashes, but I switched to a lotion with Vitamin E to help with the healing. I’m completely clear on my hands on arms. My leg scars still remain a struggle.

I’ve spoken with a Doctor about my extensive bleeding and she ordered an ultrasound. The results were not favorable. I have several fibroids that are attached to my uterus. Most are small, but there is one that is medium sized and could possibly be a cause for concern. I did not take the news well. In fact, I went into shock. I’ve never been seriously sick, in the hospital, had a broken bone or even had an IV in my arm. I feel faint at the site of the smallest needle drawing blood or giving a shot. So news of these foreign things growing inside of me felt like my world was ending. My worst fear is not being able to conceive.

My first call was to my husband. I feel worst for him that he’s dealing with all of this too. He has no idea what’s going on or how to fix it. I know he feels helpless. He’s worried about me and my health and possibly having kids. But not one time has he shown any of that. He has been my rock through all of this. He lifts my spirits when my mind starts to spiral. He gives me hope that everything will be okay. I’ve never seen him be so strong. He’s been carrying the both of us because I’ve had no strength to.

We still do not have all of the answers. My follow-up appointment is not for another week. But we have been educating ourselves. Yes, we. My husband started looking up remedies and success stories when I was resting and couldn’t go to work after being in shock. The stories of women are so inspiring. Some have surgery to remove them. Some go a more holistic route. I don’t have an unhealthy diet in general, but until I get more information from my Doctor, I’ve been looking up ways to improve my eating habits; incorporating more greens, cutting back on dairy and going organic to limit my pesticides intake.

Educating myself has proven to be the most helpful. The more I find out about fibroids, the less nervous I am. About 3/4 of American women of childbearing age suffer from fibroids. Some don’t have any symptoms and they go undetected. Others experience a heavy flow, pain, anemia and even infertility. It’s important to listen to you body, get checked, get the facts and take action. They are generally benign tumors, but they are a cause of about 1/3 of the 200,000 hysterectomies done each year.

Over the last week my spirits have lifted tremendously. Now that I know what I’m dealing with I feel hopeful that I can take control and get better. Talking through this with other women has also been beneficial to me. I haven’t shared this, but for the Lenten season I’ve been focusing on assuming positive intent in an effort to change my mindset from automatically getting defensive and instead  re-focusing my energy for good. It’s undoubtedly been a struggle, especially with learning of my fibroids, and it takes an extreme amount of discipline. I still have failings, but I’m choosing to recognize them as lessons.

I’m surrounded by so many amazing people. My parents have been encouraging and supportive (my dad is telling me to move back to D.C. so he can take care of me – aww). My in-laws check up on me to make sure I’m in good spirits. My friends have been feeding me with all positive stories. I have everything in the world to be grateful for. 

STILL counting my blessings…

Thanks for stopping by! xoxo

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